Wednesday, June 17, 2009

6-17-o9 A post Birthday extra

What didn’t I do….
……I had asked? (I)
“You haven’t taken me skinny dipping.” She’d told me, with the straightest of faces, as if I had intentionally deprived her of a must world shaking experience.
“Anything else?” (II) I asked, expecting a whole long list of shortcomings upon my part keeping our relationship tuned up, polished, and enduring; but, no that was it. What the way she proclaimed it I had no idea it would be my one and only shortcoming. I had expected more, A whole list. I was opening the door so to speak she could let the flood waters of my inadequacies to spill forth. I had asked for it, she could have let me have it laying all my faults upon me.
“No.” she’d said, “That’s it. You never took me skinny dipping.”
“Was that either before or after we were married?” (III) I asked, testing my prowess. Yeah, I did that. I asked that dumb assed question.
“It wouldn’t have made any difference?” (IV) I just had to ask when I should have known better.
She answered me with a bit of a lilt in her voice, “No!”
That was it.? Just “No?” No more than a she‘d said. A “No?” I had thought to myself.
I asked it, I had to know question. “You mean it wouldn’t have made any difference? (V) You’ve just wanted me to take you skinny dipping, even before we’re married?” (VI)
“I trusted you.” She admitted. She had trusted me. I don’t know whether that was good or bad. What kind of a reputation was that? I was trustworthy? A Boy Scout? A gentleman? Where was all the raging testosterone? Sheesh, over the years she’s told me I was the only male she’d ever been afraid of and she’d trusted me. Oh my Gosh, alone, I had set man’s caveman persona back 10,000 years. Will the gender of my species forgive me? Have I asked to many questions.
I was never a good drinker. Like holding it I mean. And I’ve already almost opened over a six-pack full of questions. I don’t think I can take another honest answer to another my opposite adolescent questions. I’ve already gotten back more than I wanted to know. What an age in life to get shot down, not that it’d ever fly again?????????
PS: I looked up adolescent’s antonym and didn’t like the choices. What a Hell of a way to start my seventy-forth day. Hmm? Dad had always said, “Any day you’ve learned something’s a day you’ve lived!” She’s trusted me!

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